Although polygamy is largely embraced in many parts of Africa and globally, that has not reduced the cases of infidelity especially here in Kenya where cheating in marriage is rampant, and this is coupled up with an array of reasons as discussed below.
In a research done by Wakajuaness.Com, I talked to a number of men who have been cheated on and visa vis women who have cheated on their husbands, and thereafter came with the reasons which will be discussed below.
1. If the man has no time for his family, like coming home late while drunk
Women have a simple heart and although they can withstand this kind of suffering for long, with time, they will seek for better men who can fill up the vacuum left by the drunkard husband.
2. To satisfy their basic need like expensive clothing
Most women ought to live comfortably changing the dressing code with fashion. They are naturally meant to create attraction and therefore they wouldn’t to go for classy things like latest brands of clothes, shoes, hairstyles, make ups etc.
Woe unto you if you are not in a position to financially support that. Don’t make a mistake of saying she should buy for herself such because the work of men, as they believe, is to provide.
3. For prestige and need to be with a world class partner
Many women tend to be with a partner who can ‘shake the world.’ The kind of man whose presence can be felt by people as she walks besides you.
This would usually include power, fame, authority among others. So if as a man you can pass a place without being noticed, leave alone getting a greeting, woe unto you.
4. Bedroom Bully
If there is one sector that as a man you should never fail, then it is in the bedroom. You can fail to bring food for her, clothes, change her hairstyle etc but never fail to satisfy her sexual desires.
Men should be strong in bed and if not the case, then there is a likelihood that your shamba boy is ‘chewing’ her. women to start cheating to avoid boredom.
5. If the man is ‘Team mafisi’
Women are vengeful beings and it does not matter if it one day or 100 years, they never forget to revenge. So if as a man you are part of team mafisi, play your cards well lest you realize that your wife is also a bonfide member of the SACCO.
In spite of cheating causes, below are the key pillars to maintain marriage life, as suggested by the people we interviewed.
1. Respect- This is the pillar reflected in how you treat each other on daily basis, it’s about the freedom to be loved for who you are.
2. Understanding– Relationships have broken up and marriages torn apart, not because they don’t love each other but because they don’t understand each other.
3. Trust- Partners in marriages should rely and confide with one other.
4. Maturity- In marriage both man and woman should be able to live up to the responsibilities of a love relationship by being dependable by keeping their words.